#47

one of my friend asked me one day,
"hey i want to make new blog, but it will contains only about me and my bf, why dont you make one yourself?"

then i laughed and said
"no need to make a new one, i have one that seems to be contained many things related to him"
am i right?

readers, my whole life have a big part that created by him, i guess. i let him created big part of me, whether he realize it or not, but yes, he does.
and when he left, what happened to me? well.. i'm in despair. i dont deny that.

i just got a gorgeous, sound, and beautiful sleep after 1 month it seemed to be fall asleep was so hard to do.
just simply have his arms wrapped around me and listened to the music of his steady breath can drove me to sleep easily.
i found my happiness again.
and i'm too scared to lose it again,

then i fucked up everything.
with me being rude, selfish, and childish.
i forgot all he need is time,
and i am too scared that i will lose him again.
so yea, i think i messed up us again.
now we wont meet for 3 weeks,
i can't have an enjoyable holiday then, knowing the chance that we might be apart again, further than before, is so big.
please, anyone who know us, understand us,
or you who dont know anything,
just pray
for our happiness,
together or not
;)